25 Years of Motherhood, 25 Lessons of Becoming: Part 2

By Dr. Anupama Vaidya (hc)

Twenty-five years ago, you arrived — not only as my daughter, but as the calm I never knew I was waiting for. You were life’s way of teaching me serenity in motion, grace in growth, and joy in quiet presence.

Today, I continue sharing the next few lessons; each a reflection, each a heartbeat; 

as I celebrate motherhood in its most beautiful, evolving form. I look forward to you continuing walking this path with me, feeling these emotions and perhaps finding echoes of your own story with mine. 

25 Lessons from 25 Years of Motherhood: Reflections on Growing Through Love.

Learning 1: Pain is inevitable, suffering is a choice

Learning 2: Listening to the quiet, not chasing the noise

(for details on 1 and 2, refer to link: https://anupamav3010.blogspot.com/2025/10/25-years-of-motherhood-25-lessons-of.html )

Learning 3: Nurturing what is still becoming, and not perfecting what’s already known:

Learning 4: Trusting Yourself in the Unknown, Not Fearing the Uncertain.

Learning 5: In Raising Her, Raising Myself.

So here are the lessons 3 to 5.... 

3. Nurturing what is still becoming, and not perfecting what’s already known:

In those early months, I often caught myself wondering if I was doing things right, feeding on time, holding her correctly, saying the right words. But somewhere between uncertainty and instinct, I realized - motherhood isn’t a checklist to complete; it’s a journey to unfold.

A child doesn’t need a perfect mother; she needs a present one.

The warmth of your touch, the steadiness of your gaze, the calm in your breath, these are the lessons they absorb long before they learn to speak.

Over time, I learnt to stop perfecting and start trusting.

To stop correcting every stumble, and start celebrating every attempt. Because growth doesn’t happen in precision, it happens in patience.

Each day, I watch her becoming, even today, slowly, tenderly, uniquely and I realize that my role isn’t to sculpt her, but to hold space while she shapes herself. 

Motherhood has taught me that nurturing isn’t about control. It’s about faith - faith in the becoming, faith in the bond, faith in the unseen rhythm of love.

4. Trusting Yourself in the Unknown, Not Fearing the Uncertain.

Motherhood threw me into a space I had never known before – a space without maps, or markers. It felt like an initiation into the unknown, where every moment tested both courage and surrender. 

There are books that offer guidance, yes, pages filled with advice, theories, and comforting words and yet they do not truly prepare you for the rhythm of sleepless nights, the sudden tears, the fragile joy of holding something so dependent on your care and yet, so divinely guided in its own becoming.

But they are only references, never the original. Because your story, your child, your rhythm; they’re all unique.

You learn to adapt, to adopt, to improvise, and to find your way not through instruction, but through intuition.

Motherhood isn’t something you read about; it’s something you live, one heartbeat, one surrender, one imperfectly perfect moment at a time.  In those early days, I often found myself second-guessing — Am I doing this right? Will she be okay? 

But somewhere between anxiety and awe, I began to realise: uncertainty isn’t the enemy; it’s the invitation.

Every mother learns to find faith in the unfamiliar: 

to trust her instincts when logic falters,

to believe in her intuition when the path is unclear.

Because the truth is, life doesn’t wait for you to feel ready.

It unfolds anyway, asking only that you show up, one heartbeat at a time.

Motherhood taught me that trust isn’t about knowing what comes next. It’s about believing that whatever comes, you’ll find the strength to meet it. And when you do, the uncertain slowly transforms - not into clarity, but into quiet confidence that you were always enough.

5. In Raising Her, Raising Myself.

You grow together — that’s the quiet truth of motherhood no one tells you. 

As your child learns to walk, you learn to let go.

As she finds her voice, you learn the grace of silence.

As she stumbles through her world, you find steadiness in yours.

Motherhood isn’t a one-way journey of teaching; it’s a circle of learning, where you both become mirrors for each other’s becoming.

In her laughter, I rediscovered joy,

In her questions, I found curiosity again,

In her resilience, I remembered my own, and 

In her silences, I learnt that love often speaks most deeply without words. 

There are days when I feel like the guide, showing her the way. And others, when I realize she is guiding me, teaching me how to see the world again with wonder, how to forgive faster, feel deeper, and believe stronger. 

Motherhood has taught me that raising a child isn’t about shaping her life, it’s about allowing her life to shape you too. 

You don’t just raise her; you rise with her.

A bridge to the next lessons. 

These five lessons have been integral to the grounding years of my motherhood....  They will remain as a foundation on which the next twenty lessons stand — lessons of trust, of rediscovery, of evolving alongside the child who once fit in your arms and now carries a world of her own.

As I continue my reflections tomorrow, I will share the next few — drawn from the tender transitions, the silences that spoke louder than words, and the beautiful becoming that motherhood continues to be.

Because the story of motherhood is never finished —
it simply unfolds, one heartbeat, one lesson, one dawn at a time.